The Armstrong 5

No, not the typical kiddo update, but a medical one!

Asher has an endoscopy/colonoscopy tomorrow, so today we are doing the whole "clearing the intestines" thing. Plus, he has to only have clear liquids all day - jello, popsicles, juice, soda, water. Surprisingly, he's doing really well! He doesn't often drink a ton but without the option for food, he's drinking liquids like a champ!

If you think of us tomorrow, pray! His procedure is at Emmanuel at 10:30am, should be done by 11:30am, and leaving the hospital in PDX around 1:30pm at the latest. Thankful that we have good insurance & a great Dr.

We'll keep you posted on the findings (which I should receive within a week or at his follow-up on March 1st). They basically just need to see the inside of his stomach & intestines to see what kind of inflammation and/or damage there might be going on, causing pain, sometimes blood & his prolapses. Those results will determine whether we need diet changes, medication or surgery (or possibly all 3). All are possibilities at this point.

I will post a kid update too :) Asher is learning to re-tell information really well! He has a memory like a steel trap too. He observes so much on his own, without us pointing things out & will tell us all about it later. His attitude has been very on & off lately, but the last week has been a major improvement. I'm learning to let him be his own person, trying new techniques for helping him understand my job as mom while still requiring obedience, & encouraging him in the ways God has made him different from me.  After talking with my mother-in-law & reading in a good book I realized that it's a stage for him, trying to gain his independence as a boy apart from me, his mom. When I give him credit for being different & independent from me, there are way fewer battles & I feel great fostering that "boy-ness" in him as well.

Asher enjoys running any and everywhere! He can run really fast for quite a while. He can also jump really far (boy after my own heart)!! Well, I feel like 4-5ft is pretty far for an almost 4yr old. Anyway, he really enjoys playing Candyland, reading bible stories, watching Dora & making up funny phrases & stories. He often says stuff like "Mom, tell me a story about you and your bike." Or "Tell me a story about going to the zoo." Love his little growing personality!

Last bit. We found a house in Beaverton. Our move in date is March17th. Craziness! I'm excited though. Mark and I just really feel like we need to just trust God's leading in our desire to move & step out, trusting that He's got good reasons for us moving out there. We've been praying for a while, especially praying that if we're to stay longer, God would just give us things to do here & the desire to stay, but our desire to go just kept getting stronger & stronger. Who knows, maybe this is one of those times where God just wants us to make a choice ourselves and trust that He'll use us & take care of us wherever we are. I'll give you more details on the actual house & neighborhood later...

Have a good week everyone - thanks for the prayers & I will do my best to keep you posted on Asher!

I realize I have not been posting very good updates lately - especially about the boys. They are ever growing, becoming so much more emotional (quite the challenge) and are never-ending bundles of energy. Recently, we took down the baby gate that leads upstairs, since Mark is no longer working at home & we can make all the noise as close to the upstairs as we wish. Well, for the kids, it has become their new favorite play place! They jump, climb, pretend they need saving & have all kinds of fun... and fights. So, please forgive me if I am not a bundle of joy myself today - I'm running low on optimism for several reasons :) Right now, I'm kind of in survival mode and it looks to be that way for a while. Life is not that bad, I'm very blessed & have all my needs met as well as many of my wants. Here's what life is looking like for me for the next few weeks... pray for me!

- to do in the next week: finish designing & printing 20pg booklet for women's retreat, finish designing & printing potential gifts, finish making slides for worship during women's retreat.
- February 21st - prep Asher for endoscopy/colonoscopy the next day - involves a clear fluid diet, lots of medicine to clean out his intestines meaning lots of time spent in the bathroom (while taking care of Cole).
- February 22nd - endoscopy/colonoscopy for Asher in PDX.
- February 23rd - recovery, dinner with our women's ministry before retreat
- February 24th-26th - women's retreat in Rockaway, OR - taking care of powerpoint for speaker & worship slides
- February 26th-March 2nd - Mark is taking a work trip to Germany, yes Germany.
- March 1st - Asher's follow-up giving test results, possible treatment plan, etc.
- sometime in March - making dentist appts for the whole family

I guess I'm feeling stressed b/c I know that even after all my obligations are fulfilled for Women's Retreat, I am 100% on-duty for the kids without even getting to say bye to Mark. That, and this constant up & down with moving, waiting, moving, deciding, looking at places, figuring out money, paying off bills that we have been delinquent on. I mean, we could focus on staying put & just keep paying those things off, but I'm not sure how much longer my sanity will hold up with Mark being gone for 12hrs a day, every day still knowing that eventually we will be moving. He has some other work-things going on with the other business he develops applications for so maybe that's the needle that is breaking this camels back. I'm a planner through and through, so waiting to move is torture... I figure, if we know we're going to, let's get one with figuring out all the details.

Anyway, I'm trying really hard to be excited, happy & positive about my role in all of these things... but it's been especially tough today. Things like letting the kids watch TV so I can get things done keeps making me feel guilty. I hate for them to watch a bunch of TV, but it's seriously the ONLY peace I get at home. Otherwise, kids are either fighting, talking to me, asking me questions, wanting me to do something for them, not obeying, making a mess or talking back. Add in being solely responsible for 3 full meals, laundry, cleaning, bills, errands & all the other random to-do's that come along with that and you have a recipe for exhaustion. I sure hope some of you can relate. With little boys, the attention span is smaller & their energy is incessant... just not sure how to cope today. I hate trying to take comfort in the fact that this stage won't last forever. I know it is true but that doesn't help me feel glad about being here now. I need to hunker down & trust that God knows I'm here & that there is some great purpose in it. Not just parenting my kiddos, but in shaping me for whatever is to come.

I've never been the type to want consistency or stability so much, but today, I just long for a place that is "permanent," my own, by myself where I can sleep, eat, knit, read & write without interruption and not think about everything that the next 2-4 months will be bringing my way and how it will for sure shift my world & daily life, much less thinking about all the ways it might could potentially shift our world (especially in regards to Asher). Again, this question of how to cope right now without wishing away the next 2 weeks. Pray for me! I guess that's what I really need :)